You Can't Always Get What You Want

I wanted it so much and now I wish I never got it.

I never got to see Haste the Day. I never got my $15 back. I never got to be pretty.

My CD player crapped out on me. Actually, I don't even think it can be called a CD player because when I got it for Christmas (oh, seven years ago) it was referred to as a "boom box". Yeah. I think I got it when Walkmans were still cool. Now my boom box decided to give up and not to fight the good fight any longer. I kept trying to hit the 'next' button, after the thirtieth try of nothing happening the button got sucked into the plastic interior. No more next button. I then tried to turn it off. And again. And again. And again. Finally I just got so fed up I unplugged the entire thing. Now I'm in search of something that will play CDs and isn't too ugly. I did find a music machine that will play CDs and records. Maybe I can also retire my huge record player that has speakers the size of a large cow. Now that I no longer have my stereo, I realize how much I love my music. Listening to the radio only holds so much joy.

Sometimes, when I'm alone, listening to music, not thinking, not wanting to think, just blinking and breathing, I feel like I'm missing something. Someone.

I haven't worn a black shirt once to school. If you know me, this is a big deal. Lots of blues and greens and whites.

Martin Luther King Jr. is amazing not just because of the changes he sparked throughout the world and in the hearts of many people but he also got me out of school. Thank You.


--Carmen