Feelings.

This is a scary topic (at least for me) and I don't suggest reading this post if you don't want to know all the emotional crap I'm going through or if you don't know how to keep up with a choppy thought pattern. People might wonder why I would talk about personal things on this blog and it's because it's my blog. It's my place to write about my personal crap and you don't have to read it.

Onward.

...and I don't normally write about personal things. I just need to get this out...

Onward once more.

I feel so alone. My life is pretty good right now. I have new and exciting things going on and I really am happy. But for some reason, lately, I've been wanting someone. Anyone. Just a companion... something.

And people say, "Just go to God. He's all you need." This statement is very true but if it wasn't good for Adam to be alone, why is it good for me? Maybe I'm being sefish and pathetic but I've been single and waiting for a while I just don't think it's good for me to be alone anymore. Er, at least, I don't want to be alone anymore.

I don't want to have a different date every night. I don't want someone to pay for my food. I don't want to wonder about religious views. I just want someone to call. Even more simplistic and girly, I want someone to like. I want someone worth liking. It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who loves Jesus and doesn't look like the bottom of my shoe.

It's just so stupid. And it makes me feel stupid. I don't need someone. Like I said, I really am happy but it would be nice to be happy with someone.

This makes me sound desperate. I'm pretty sure I am.


Carmen.